^View from the main lobby deck.
When we arrived at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic, I think the consensus was that we were all
blown away by the sheer size of this resort.
Guarded gate and walls, an 18-hole golf course designed by Jack Nicklaus. 1,790 rooms, 9 restaurants, 15 pools, ½ mile
stretch of beach, tennis courts, basketball courts, spas, gyms. And last but not least, the casino. You name it, it was there, so it can feel a
little overwhelming when you first arrive.
I encourage you to take a lap around the resort to get a feel for the
place. We quickly realized that we were the only people who were at the resort
for 7 days. At an all-inclusive resort,
that’s like running a marathon, and tacking on an additional half marathon just
to be sure you’ve really wiped yourself out.
We timed check-in just right in the early afternoon on a
Saturday. The friendly staff greeted us
by asking us what we were drinking. Chris
Brown (all the staff members have a celebrity “doppelgänger” name) gave us a
brief overview of the resort credit that came with our rooms. We booked two rooms and each room had $1,500
in resort credit, in other words, each person had $750 to spend in extras such
as golf outings, spa time, and merchandise.
^Room service every day is a must. The papaya was incredible.
On the second day the fun
really began. We all had breakfast and
met on the tennis courts for a quick set.
After breakfast, Chasen, Hunter, and I headed to the beach and Sebastian
went to grab a bite to eat before joining us.
It turned out to be a fatal mistake.
He ate at The Market buffet and had the seafood paella. By the time we were supposed to
go to dinner that night, we had a soldier down.
I’ll spare you the details of the food poisoning. Things escalated quickly.
I got in the ambulance with Sebastian and they kept assuring
us that we were going to “the private hospital,” with purportedly better
service than the public hospital.. I guess?
After arriving at the Hospiten,
as it was called (should have been called Hospifive because it was only half of
a hospital), we had a nightmare trying to get Sebastian’s insurance company to
authorize the payment. Thank god Chasen
is nearly fluent in Spanish because they literally would not treat him until
they received payment. Poor Chasen dealt
with the payment team at the hospital until
6 in the morning. And Hunter and I
made friends with Carlos, the guard on duty in the lobby. That turned out to be a mistake. Carlos liked hanging out with us and
apparently wasn’t used to that much excitement during the graveyard shift. So to keep himself entertained he would turn
the lights on while we were trying to sleep on the wooden benches in the waiting
room and make all kinds of noises. I’ll let you use your imagination. The scary part was that Carlos had a loaded
gun. You don’t leave the Hospiten until
you pay your bill.
Finally. Finally, the
payment got authorized, but they wouldn’t let Sebastian go until the follow
day, so Hunter, Chasen, and I went back to the resort and slept for a
while. We salvaged the day with golf in
the afternoon. Things got a little rowdy
on the golf course. A cart may have been
jumped, and I may have lost my phone by the end of the round. That evening we ate at Los Gallos, the Mexican restaurant. It
wouldn’t have been a proper dinner without telling the wait staff that it was
Chasen’s birthday, even though it certainly wasn't. Birthday song, chimichangas, sombreros; these
are the three essential ingredients for success at Los Gallos.
The next day, Sebastian had come back to us and the team
reassembled. We were wounded but not out
of the race. We assumed our positions
and I walked over to a group of about 6 girls to say hello. 30 seconds into the conversation they tell me
that they go to school in Washington, DC and sure enough, we were all GW
students! They were all Latin American
fireballs from Mexico City, Caracas, Bogota, and Panama. Sparks flying, drinks flowing, and a sunset
on the beach, we stayed in the pool until almost 10pm. The rest is history. Nicole and Joanna became two of my best
friends when we got back school and I still talk to them regularly. I hope to visit them in Paris when they study
abroad in the Fall.
^Sebastian back in action, wearing his "flippers" as he liked to call them, the slippers that the hotel provides.
We managed to make it to a late dinner before going out that night. We played a few hands at the Casino while we
waited for some other friends to arrive, who had two tables at Oro, the
flagship club at the Hard Rock. Spring
breakers from all the other resorts flock to this club in droves. As if this wasn’t enough, we went to Imagine, another nightclub the
following night. My ears are still
ringing. I’ve never been to a place that
plays more obnoxiously loud music. The
club is underground in a cave so the music echoes down at you in the worst
way. Go with the all-inclusive option at
Imagine. You’re going to need a bottle
of water at the very least since it’s so hot.
The alternative is to pay close to $10 for a bottle of water.
^The team's all here.
The next day brought a much-needed detox. We spent the morning at the spa getting
massages and rotating through all of their different rooms and baths. The circuit included an ice room, where they
give you a bucket of ice to hold and spray you with cold water, a clay room,
where you rubbed clay all over your body, a sauna, and a steam room. All the while, they were serving these
delectable oatmeal raisin cookies, and chlorophyll water, which I couldn’t get
enough of!
Though not necessary in the slightest, Sebastian wanted to
thank us for our efforts at the hospital, so he surprised us with dinner at Simon Mansion, the one restaurant at the
resort that is not included in the all-inclusive package. We enjoyed quite the spread of lobster
ravioli, steaks, and salmon. They also
made a fine Manhattan with Stanton bourbon whiskey.
^Thinking about purchasing a Fender guitar? You can test one out at the Hard Rock for free!
From the high of being up several hundred dollars on the
blackjack table to the low of losing it all on one gutsy round of roulette, and
from the high from beautiful weather and people to the low of knowing you ate
and drank too much; we had an incredible week.
As we all gathered for one last cappuccino and Kahlua at the end of our 8-day
journey, we agreed it was one to remember.
We went out with a bang. We
missed our shuttle to the airport, and held up the plane on the tarmac. We dashed up the stairs to the plane, they
closed the cabin door, and we flew back to reality.
