Punta Cana Part II

^View from the main lobby deck.

When we arrived at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic, I think the consensus was that we were all blown away by the sheer size of this resort.  Guarded gate and walls, an 18-hole golf course designed by Jack Nicklaus.  1,790 rooms, 9 restaurants, 15 pools, ½ mile stretch of beach, tennis courts, basketball courts, spas, gyms.  And last but not least, the casino.  You name it, it was there, so it can feel a little overwhelming when you first arrive.  I encourage you to take a lap around the resort to get a feel for the place. We quickly realized that we were the only people who were at the resort for 7 days.  At an all-inclusive resort, that’s like running a marathon, and tacking on an additional half marathon just to be sure you’ve really wiped yourself out.

We timed check-in just right in the early afternoon on a Saturday.  The friendly staff greeted us by asking us what we were drinking.  Chris Brown (all the staff members have a celebrity “doppelgänger” name) gave us a brief overview of the resort credit that came with our rooms.  We booked two rooms and each room had $1,500 in resort credit, in other words, each person had $750 to spend in extras such as golf outings, spa time, and merchandise.

^Room service every day is a must.  The papaya was incredible.

On the second day the fun really began.  We all had breakfast and met on the tennis courts for a quick set.  After breakfast, Chasen, Hunter, and I headed to the beach and Sebastian went to grab a bite to eat before joining us.  It turned out to be a fatal mistake.  He ate at The Market buffet and had the seafood paella. By the time we were supposed to go to dinner that night, we had a soldier down.  I’ll spare you the details of the food poisoning.  Things escalated quickly.

I got in the ambulance with Sebastian and they kept assuring us that we were going to “the private hospital,” with purportedly better service than the public hospital.. I guess?  After arriving at the Hospiten, as it was called (should have been called Hospifive because it was only half of a hospital), we had a nightmare trying to get Sebastian’s insurance company to authorize the payment.  Thank god Chasen is nearly fluent in Spanish because they literally would not treat him until they received payment.  Poor Chasen dealt with the payment team at the hospital until 6 in the morning.  And Hunter and I made friends with Carlos, the guard on duty in the lobby.  That turned out to be a mistake.  Carlos liked hanging out with us and apparently wasn’t used to that much excitement during the graveyard shift.  So to keep himself entertained he would turn the lights on while we were trying to sleep on the wooden benches in the waiting room and make all kinds of noises.  I’ll let you use your imagination.  The scary part was that Carlos had a loaded gun.  You don’t leave the Hospiten until you pay your bill.

Finally.  Finally, the payment got authorized, but they wouldn’t let Sebastian go until the follow day, so Hunter, Chasen, and I went back to the resort and slept for a while.  We salvaged the day with golf in the afternoon.  Things got a little rowdy on the golf course.  A cart may have been jumped, and I may have lost my phone by the end of the round.  That evening we ate at Los Gallos, the Mexican restaurant.  It wouldn’t have been a proper dinner without telling the wait staff that it was Chasen’s birthday, even though it certainly wasn't.  Birthday song, chimichangas, sombreros; these are the three essential ingredients for success at Los Gallos.

^Chasen's birthday dinner.

The next day, Sebastian had come back to us and the team reassembled.  We were wounded but not out of the race.  We assumed our positions and I walked over to a group of about 6 girls to say hello.  30 seconds into the conversation they tell me that they go to school in Washington, DC and sure enough, we were all GW students!  They were all Latin American fireballs from Mexico City, Caracas, Bogota, and Panama.  Sparks flying, drinks flowing, and a sunset on the beach, we stayed in the pool until almost 10pm.  The rest is history.  Nicole and Joanna became two of my best friends when we got back school and I still talk to them regularly.  I hope to visit them in Paris when they study abroad in the Fall.

^Sebastian back in action, wearing his "flippers" as he liked to call them, the slippers that the hotel provides.

We managed to make it to a late dinner before going out that night.  We played a few hands at the Casino while we waited for some other friends to arrive, who had two tables at Oro, the flagship club at the Hard Rock.  Spring breakers from all the other resorts flock to this club in droves.  As if this wasn’t enough, we went to Imagine, another nightclub the following night.  My ears are still ringing.  I’ve never been to a place that plays more obnoxiously loud music.  The club is underground in a cave so the music echoes down at you in the worst way.  Go with the all-inclusive option at Imagine.  You’re going to need a bottle of water at the very least since it’s so hot.  The alternative is to pay close to $10 for a bottle of water.

^The team's all here.

The next day brought a much-needed detox.  We spent the morning at the spa getting massages and rotating through all of their different rooms and baths.  The circuit included an ice room, where they give you a bucket of ice to hold and spray you with cold water, a clay room, where you rubbed clay all over your body, a sauna, and a steam room.  All the while, they were serving these delectable oatmeal raisin cookies, and chlorophyll water, which I couldn’t get enough of!

Though not necessary in the slightest, Sebastian wanted to thank us for our efforts at the hospital, so he surprised us with dinner at Simon Mansion, the one restaurant at the resort that is not included in the all-inclusive package.  We enjoyed quite the spread of lobster ravioli, steaks, and salmon.  They also made a fine Manhattan with Stanton bourbon whiskey.

^Thinking about purchasing a Fender guitar?  You can test one out at the Hard Rock for free!

From the high of being up several hundred dollars on the blackjack table to the low of losing it all on one gutsy round of roulette, and from the high from beautiful weather and people to the low of knowing you ate and drank too much; we had an incredible week.  As we all gathered for one last cappuccino and Kahlua at the end of our 8-day journey, we agreed it was one to remember.  We went out with a bang.  We missed our shuttle to the airport, and held up the plane on the tarmac.  We dashed up the stairs to the plane, they closed the cabin door, and we flew back to reality.